Snuck on to a secret spot on the beach for a quick meditation. Kept our social distance and masks in public. But dude, a rest, reset, and recharge was so needed! Thanks bro bro for keeping me sane @thecaspercas ! #quarantinelife What are you doing to reset and recharge? Drop your #quarantinetips below
Feeling a little less subconscious about my germophobia these days. #silverlinings
I just got tested for COVID-19. I was in multiple endemic countries in the last few weeks and yesterday my throat started hurting, I was achy, exhausted and had a slight cough. I had a cold about 10 days ago that was responsive to antibiotics so it’s likely a recurrence of the same cold I was fighting then, especially since i’m a week late for my monthly IV that treats my genetic immune deficiency, but better to be safe than sorry. Be smart and stay safe out there! Even if you are young, healthy and have a great immune system, without knowing it you could be exposing someone like me that has a weakened immune system. Let’s all look out for each other and get through this quickly! #quarantined #covıd19
One more week until this crazy journey is over! I’m sad it’s ending but stoked to cuddle Duke and Dex next week! I can’t wait to tell you all about this wild ride, stay tuned...
Sitting back, observing, listening and taking in the moment is something I’m currently working hard on. My tendency is to fill silence with talking, and to talk too much. Meanwhile, the reality is I really want to listen and take everything in, but anxiety kicks in and I can’t shut up! lol. Active listening takes practice for me, what social habits do you struggle with? How do you overcome? ________________ #talktoomuch #anxiety #socialcues #evolving #instadaily #instagood #trans #thisistrans #ftm #transisbeautiful
I just realized these are the only photos I have from @nikkacy @equalityfashionweek . I guess I was too busy finding everyone a seat at the packed event lol. Congratulations NiK on a hugely successful night of highlighting the beauty of unapologetic authenticity! Congrats to @allisonkjoseph and @augustbrave on the win and to all the designers and models for the incredible performances! #unapologeticauthenticity #diversityandinclusion #diversity #lgbtqia #lgbtq #transisbeautiful #ftm #mtf #nb #queer #gendrfwd @gendrfwd @thecaspercas #genderdiversity #enby
Did you know that when you’ve had a constant period of unfortunate luck, hard times, stress and negative energy, it can actually rewire you brain to lean toward a more negative outlook? It can literally hardwire your brain away from positivity. I have had a virtually continuous 14 yr streak of unfortunate incidents, random accidents and illnesses and I started noticing a shift in my positivity. My normal unending positivity became harder to access and my innate ability to push through everything thrown at me became less innate and much more of a struggle. I felt I was losing myself. I started getting super depressed and feeling strangely apathetic. It wasn’t clear if this was a direct result of the brain injuries/concussions, simply being beyond exhausted from struggling for so long, a multifaceted effect of everything, or if all of the trauma was really changing my outlook. I started reading a book called “Hardwiring Happiness,” and it discusses how if trauma and negative experiences dominate your thought processes for long enough, it rewires it to what is being constantly reinforced. To offset this, we have to consciously give space and focused attention to the good things that are happening. Not taking even the smallest positive things for granted, but rather, recognizing it and giving it at least a few seconds of conscious thought and focus. I used to have a regular gratitude practice that I did before sleep and in the morning before starting my day. I’m starting that back today, and hopefully with it ramping my meditation practice back up. I’m also making sure I do things that feed my soul and help me reset and recharge. Being in, around, or near nature and/or water is one of those things that I don’t do enough, but I’m going to work on that as well. —- Do you stress over all the bad stuff and forget to breathe in and let the positive stuff have a bit space too? —- What’s your go to for self care and what feeds your soul? — #hardwiringhappiness #positivitybreedspositivity #soulfood #selfcare #mentalhealthisimportant #transisbeautiful #gendrfwd
Living the majority of my life in the wrong body, pretending w all my might to fit the designation of female I was assigned at birth, was torture. The daily trauma of wearing a costume and trying to pretend it wasn’t just that was a mind fck for a child. I tried telling everyone I was a boy as a small child, but no one understood, including myself, and the trauma I endured when trying to fight for that identity was something I never wanted to face again. _____ I was in my 30s before I met my first transman. A new friend that wasn’t out yet told me about himself and I responded I don’t know much about it, but I see you, I support you and I’m willing to read and learn. As the conversation ended, he looked at me squarely and stated, you do know your trans too, right? Woah! Full stop! I was so thrown off, barely knowing how to respond but adamantly denying it. I spent the next 12 years in denial. I would say I’m just me, I’m neither a boy or a girl, and while that felt partially authentic, the truth is I didn’t want to be trans! I didn’t want more trauma, to be marginalized or treated like a freak. I didn’t want to be rejected at work or by my family. I would say anything to convince myself and anyone else I wasn’t trans. I came out as non-binary and told myself that was enough. ____ Cut to a series of random accidents resulting in brain trauma that took me out of my work/excuse. Breast cancer 💯 driven by estrogen that took the breasts I cried about getting as a child. BC plus my random genetic anomalies (blood clotting and immune deficiency ) and my ovaries had to be removed. The universe essentially beginning the transition for me. _____ Still in denial and my health failing from being so young and absent hormones, I agreed to begin low dose testosterone for my health, knowing I would masculinize some, but able to justify it bc I truly needed it for my health. 2 doses in, l knew it was the missing piece to everything in my life. I finally admitted my truth and began taking steps to become my authentic self, and it has literally been the easiest and best thing I’ve ever done. #authenticityissexy #transisbeautiful #transformationtuesday #phluidcasting
Bringing home the latest #bonobabysphynx , #bonodavidbono ! I seriously could not have cuter godkids! Already a snuggle bug. Much sweeter than his namesake so far, #davidschittscreek 😝 .. .. #babydavid #babystevie #sphynxkitten #davidbabybono #steviebabybono #schittscreek #reunited @therealchazbono @sharablue
I think it’s crazy and wonderful and amazing that simply being in the presence of or just speaking with friends that genuinely love me can be all it takes to pull me up from the depths enough to find a light and a smile again. Prior to the last couple accidents I was a never ending source of positivity. Since, I run out sometimes. The magical thing is, whenever I run out, there is always one of you to lift me up. I feel like I’ve said this numerous times in the last year or so, but it simply can’t be said enough how grateful I am for your friendships and your love!! And how much a simple reply to a text or a phone call means sometimes. You truly make me a better man and inspire me to keep pushing! . If you are feeling down, hopeless, or apathetic, reach out, I’ll always be here for you, friend, stranger, or foe! . . #reachout #wethrivetogether #askingforhelpisbrave #weallgetdownsometimes #lovemyfriends #ftm #transisbeautiful #gendrfwd
Who besides my hair and I are ready to get wet and wild tomorrow with a bunch O’ Queers?!! Join us at the W Hotel, poolside for #queerfundip with @goodboymorgan !! See Goodboy’s bio for ticket link! If you missed my bday party a few weeks ago, come celebrate with me tomorrow! Let’s have some queer fun in the sun!! . . @jessweiner @goodboyspartyline @djwhitneyday @edenentertainmentgroup
The last day of camp was bittersweet. The campers/youth taught me more than I could’ve imagined! They give me so much hope for a brighter future for society. They understand fluidity, they see all the levels of gray and they possess emotional intelligence most adults never obtain. If only we could be more like them! Thanks for having me back as a #campcounselor , it was an honor! #thelaurelfoundation #camplaurel #protecttranskids #transyouthcanp2019 #gendrfwd
Happy 4th yo! Duke is nursing me through a stomach/food poison type thing, so we’re laying low. Have fun and be safe out there!
It’s my fucking birthday! Happy two year Manniversary to me! . . 📸 @meg_alopolis